tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-344900867722860530.post791629335574312976..comments2024-03-21T08:05:38.385-04:00Comments on Ask An MD: Should Fear of Patients Keep You From Medicine?Doctor Dhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15967600225173640437noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-344900867722860530.post-54364409177356978982011-09-28T23:18:09.395-04:002011-09-28T23:18:09.395-04:00Something that I have learned as a medical student...Something that I have learned as a medical student is that your own emotions can be a reflection of the emotions of those you are working with. If you are experiencing this type of uneasiness, then you can harness it as a useful tool. It can help you to seek to make your patients more comfortable, and will in turn strengthen the therapeutic relationship.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-344900867722860530.post-80098934266817727162010-07-18T12:24:05.188-04:002010-07-18T12:24:05.188-04:00“You can hold back from the suffering of the world...“You can hold back from the suffering of the world . . . but perhaps this very holding back is the one suffering that you could have avoided.” ---Franz Kafka<br /><br /><br />I used to have the happy fantasy that all doctors knew how to handle the suffering of others, and that this secret wisdom kept them from ever feeling upset. Well, now I’ve been seriously ill for awhile, and I’ve had the chance to see that doctors struggle with this all the time. If I did not see doctors who are sometimes uncomfortable around illness, there probably wouldn’t be any doctors left for me to see!<br /><br />A doctor’s discomfort in reaction to my illness doesn’t bother me. It seems normal. In fact, it’s kind of distressing when my suffering does NOT seem to bother a doctor. It’s always kind of hard to have a doctor who feels locked up and robotic. Maybe they are the most frightened ones of all. <br /> <br />It honors me when a doctor is upset on my behalf for a moment (a doctor isn’t ALWAYS in a crisis mode where swift action is the only good response). It acknowledges that I matter and that they want me to be well. Those are good things to articulate to a patient. To me, it’s okay if doctors show that they feel rotten or are scared or frustrated; I think those feelings are inevitable when things aren’t going well, and expressing them doesn’t have to involve a lot of drama or hysterics. I get the impression that some doctors feel a professional obligation to never shed a tear in front of a patient or show sadness or dismay (or, worse, to never feel anything in the first place). Or maybe they think it’s dangerous because they might get overwhelmed and not be able to drop it and move on with a clear head. . . . Admittedly, none of this is easy.<br /><br />I think the pre-med student who raised this topic is way ahead of the game to be aware of these sorts of feelings and to be grappling with them already.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-344900867722860530.post-87042150354988669502010-07-17T23:05:02.032-04:002010-07-17T23:05:02.032-04:00As a patient, I will always prefer a doctor who ca...As a patient, I will always prefer a doctor who can show some empathy and compassion toward me. I'm not sure I've ever been to a doctor who was scared of me (I have rheumatoid arthritis, a frustrating and incurable disease); if I have, they've covered it well. I have been to doctors who showed no interest or compassion toward me, though, and they are no longer my doctors.<br /><br />Good luck to the scared pre-med student, whatever decision she makes. Perhaps a career in medical research might work for her, if she cannot overcome her fear of ill patients.<br />-WrenAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-344900867722860530.post-873731293070894962010-07-14T13:33:12.781-04:002010-07-14T13:33:12.781-04:00Rachel Naomi Remen, M.D. speaks to compassion fat...Rachel Naomi Remen, M.D. speaks to compassion fatigue and burn out in her work and lectures with med students. She also writes about it in her book, "Kitchen Table Wisdom: Stories that Heal." It helped me understand my doctors more - as well as my own healing process because she spoke as a physician who has a chronic illness. <br /><br />We are all healing because ultimately we will all face death - of ourselves and our family and loved ones. So yes - I am OK with a doc who is still growing in some areas as long as we have a supportive relationship with each other based on TRUST and mutual understanding.Nohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08431705820735752859noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-344900867722860530.post-30782717407968820452010-07-13T15:48:30.296-04:002010-07-13T15:48:30.296-04:00I grew up in hospitals, so I am already comfortabl...I grew up in hospitals, so I am already comfortable with the fact of my own mortality and being around other seriously ill people doesn't phase me. One of the things my patients say they like most about me is I don't treat them like they're sick. I talk to them like anyone else, and treat their complaints as an ordinary part of the conversation. I won't say that I haven't cried when I've lost some patients, though. Mostly I'm just upset that they're gone.<br />I'm a nurse though, not a doc. I guess a lot of the same things apply though.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03651870679047744261noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-344900867722860530.post-37387523954152833692010-07-13T10:10:56.387-04:002010-07-13T10:10:56.387-04:00Just remember, the patients are more afraid of you...Just remember, the patients are more afraid of you than you are of them! <br />eh, never mind, that kind of advice never helps in any situation.<br /><br />LindaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com